Sunday, July 17, 2011


A friend told me that to ease the pain, put a number on it, At first I didn't get what she was saying and then I though about it and tried to apply it. I did and it's working wonders.

The theory is instead of dwelling on shit put a number on it. There are no emotional ties with numbers. Replace the pain with a number and one day at a time you will get over it. So in my situation every day is a new number. Everyday I'm adding +1 and the higher the number gets I can realize I'm actually moving on, So what I do is write a note to myself everyday on a "post it" app. i.e "Day 6. Stay Strong."

So far it's working, I'm not saying everything is fine and dandy, but I feel a whole hell of a lot better. 

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Crossing the Line

When me and my Ex broke up 4 months ago (yea that long ago) Im not gonna lie. I was pretty sad. Although we ended on good terms, I knew nothing would ever be the same again. Why? Because I played the friend card. Before we started dating, we were really good friends. I made my move the day she broke up with her long term bf... Looking back, I prolly never should of. Dont get me wrong I enjoyed the 3 years we were together. Was it perfect.... No, but it was what made me happy. When things slowly started to hit the fan, I saw one of my best friends.. before and after, we got into a relationship grow away from me. No one ever wants to waste time and invest so much into something they know won't work out I didn't think I was... but I feel like I did, and in the process not only lost my gf... I lost a friend. I mean we're still cool and on good terms but it just will never be the same again.

I hear it all the time, "You'll find someone", "There's plenty of fish in the sea", "It just wasn't meant to be" - Yea I know all that... The thing is I lost a good friend too, and that's harder to find than a Girlfriend.

I Should have Never Crossed The Line.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Facebook Hiatus

So I gave up Facebook. You already knew that. I gave it up for a few reasons. 1. I'm on it too damn much, Like my first instinct when I grab my phone is to hit the FB App. BAD. 2. I say way too much on FB. I'm an emotional dude, I wear my heart on my sleeve so sharing EVERYTHING with the FB community wasn't always the best idea. I know you must be thinking well what the hell is the difference between FB and this Blog... Well EVERYBODY is on FB, My Mom, Aunts, Cousins, Friends, EVERYBODY. Yea anyone can read this blog, but the casual FBer won't so only people that really wanna stalk me and get up in my business will actually read this. 3. Lastly if you didn't know I just got out a pretty serious relationship. I found myself  looking, and looking and looking at her page, old pics on mine, on other friends pages and seeing her as a common friend. It just didn't help my healing process. Deleting her off my friend wouldn't really do much because of the fact that it still would be almost impossible to get her off my page completely.

I don't know, I really wanna get back on but don't know if I should. Let's see how long this lasts.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Allow Me To Introduce Myself.

So here I am.. Blogging. If you don't know who I am.. Why are you reading this? Well my name is DARWIN. Why am I blogging? I recently just gave up Facebook (Who knows how long that will last) so I am now bored outta my mind. Twitter is cool but just doesn't cut it. The real reason I'm blogging is because I have so many thoughts in my mind and I don't really like sharing them.. at least out loud. I have so many emotions that I feel the need to release but just don't have the outlet. Imma make a deal with you... I will be as real and as open as I can be... Just don't ask me about it. Let me release my feeling and emotions this way and you will have me blogging as often as I can... Ask me about it and I may just stop coz I really don't want to talk about it. If I did I wouldn't be blogging. Kapeesh? Good.

So the Evolution of Me.... This should be interesting.